Biggest mistake I made with a Bangkok escort was not asking about extras. She gave me a rushed blowjob, then asked for 1,000 baht more for CIM. Sex in cowgirl and doggy was good, but the surprise charge left a bad taste. Always settle it first.

In Pattaya I booked an “escort” from an online ad — photo looked like a model. The girl who showed up was 20 kilos heavier. I still went for it, but the oral sex was lazy and she left after 30 minutes. Fake photos are a huge scam in the Pattaya escorts scene.

Phuket mistake: met a freelancer in Bangla Road, agreed to long-time for 3,000 baht. After one blowjob and one round in missionary, she got dressed and said “I go now.” I was too drunk to argue. Lesson: always clarify what long-time really means.

Fell hard for a Thai escort in Bangkok who gave me the full GFE — cuddled, kissed, amazing sex with reverse cowgirl and a deepthroat blowjob. Next week I saw her with another customer in Nana. Realized fast I was just another client. Don’t fall in love.

One expensive mistake: barfined a Pattaya escort thinking it was just 1,500 baht total. Turned out the barfine was 1,500 and she wanted another 2,000 for herself. The sex was fine — blowjob and CIM for extra — but my wallet took a beating. Always ask if the price includes barfine or not.

I’ve seen plenty of guys screw this up in Bangkok, Pattaya, and Phuket. Escorts can give you an amazing time, but only if you avoid the common traps. Here are the biggest mistakes I see over and over:

Not agreeing on the price first – Whether you’re meeting an escort off Sukhumvit or through a bar in Nana Plaza, never assume. Agree on the full rate, what’s included (BJ, CIM, overnight, etc.), and stick to it.

Mixing booze and decisions – I’ve watched guys on LK Metro in Pattaya overpay double because they were too drunk to count their own money. Sort the details while you’re sober.

Expecting a girlfriend experience automatically – Some escorts are warm and affectionate, others treat it as a quick job. If you want cuddling or conversation, make that clear — or you’ll be disappointed.

Not watching valuables – Whether you’re in a Bangkok condo or a short-time hotel off Walking Street, don’t leave your wallet and phone lying around. Ninety-nine percent of escorts are honest, but that one percent will ruin your night.

Forgetting respect – The fastest way to kill the vibe is to treat her like a disposable toy. Escorts in Phuket, Pattaya, or Bangkok talk to each other — if you’re rude, word spreads fast.

Avoid these mistakes and you’ll usually get way more than you paid for — better service, fewer headaches, and maybe even a girl who’s happy to see you again.